With unbelievable amounts of prayer, we have made it through the first 3 weeks, post-miscarriage. I still find it difficult to see new Facebook posts from friends announcing pregnancy, and it’s not because I am jealous of them or sad to see so many of my good friends so happy in this new season of their lives. I suppose it is difficult because I feel like I’m in limbo, I was pregnant for 16 weeks, and went through a few milestones and watched my baby-bump app show my little nugget getting bigger inside me each week.
It’s difficult not to feel like my pregnancy was just a dream, perhaps that is my mind protecting me from the grief, but it feels as though we’ve been trying to conceive for all these months. After today’s appointment I am quite hopeful that we will conceive relatively soon. My Nurse Practitioner discussed with me how odd my case was, and how normally your body recognizes the death of the fetus and dispels the tissue within a couple weeks. She also agreed that it was good I had the D&C because of my heavy bleeding (she said I bled like a redhead? Apparently they bleed a lot!)
Based on my examination, and the normalcy of my healing from the surgery, I have been given a clean bill of health. I am continuing to build up my endurance for running, and hope to be able to carry that through a next pregnancy (of course we’re heading into the winter months now, where I would have to find an indoor exercise option.) Michael and I have laid out some fantastic budget plans, which include becoming debt-free and buying a house in 2015! It will take hard work and a lot of patience and restraint, but I’m confident we can do it.
We are so thankful for all of the prayers of our family and friends, we are beyond blessed and have been lifted up during this tough time. We are continuing to heal emotionally, though it does still strike us at the most unusual times. We give God all the glory and honor Him in our lives above all else.